The Root of Empathic Behavior

What is an Empath?

One succinct definition is: “The capacity to know emotionally what another is experiencing from within the frame of reference of that other person, the capacity to sample the feelings of another or to put one’s self in another’s shoes.” – D.M. Berger

An Empath is defined by being able to sense or feel the feelings and state of being of others. Often times the Empath is also Intuitive and will pick up pictures, words or phrases as well coming from another person or group. It can be overwhelming until it is recognized and properly focused. Empaths can have a very hard life growing up, often mistaken for highly emotional or disturbed, when in fact they are extremely sensitive emotionally and spiritually with feelings often not even their own.

Are you an Empath?

If the following applies to you, you are definitely an Empath. If you have doubt about any one of them, you are most likely not. The truth will be clear to you.

• You are often very emotional for no reason, especially in a group of people, unaware of the cause. Easily overwhelmed in crowds and busy places.
• Being alone helps you to recoup your energy and recharge after being around a lot people.
• Strangers tend to tell you everything about their lives, ailments and problems.
• You can often physically or emotionally feel the pain or disability of others.
• You experience an overwhelming emotional response to seeing someone suffer, in person, TV or movies. You simply cannot pass someone injured without stopping to help them, and can’t understand why others aren’t the same way.
• You always know what someone means. You sense or feel not just hear and truly understand the meaning of things. This makes it easy for you to tell if someone is lying or being false as well.
• You have the ability to heal yourself and often others. You have a natural ability which helps to transmute the pain of others, and a reason strangers are drawn to you to offer their problems. Your ability allows you to usually keep in physical health if you are able to move the energy through you efficiently.

Root & Symptoms of Empathic Bahavior

By design, the empathic possesses the ability to sense beyond their own being, which stems from three possible sources: 1) a traumatic event as a child (or even as an adult) or 2) having been raised by emotionally unpredictable or abusive parenting, or 3) raised with a family member who needs care from an illness or chronic condition.

1)      The trauma’s effect on a child (or adult) is that which the situation is too difficult emotionally to deal with and the child ‘checks out’ or leaves the body, removing themselves emotionally from the event. They become a fly on the wall. Often times these events can even become a suppressed or forgotten memory, but forever changes the brain connections and the person’s mode of operation. It becomes easy to be other people, to step into their shoes. They quickly adapt to being outside of their own being. This often leads to:

1. Lifelong drama
   1. i.      being involved in and taking on other people’s problems
   2. ii.      feeling responsible for others
   3. iii.      feeling the pain and suffering of others, causing depression
2. Weight and health issues
   1. i.      not tending to the body
   2. ii.      developing addictions such as eating, smoking, drinking, drugs (and other excessive behavior)
   3. iii.      denial of personal issues and often bad memory

2)      Growing up in an abusive or unpredictable household creates a need in a child to always be aware of their parents’ emotional state, so they may be ready and act accordingly. This is heightened senses in survival mode and over a long period of time, a child becomes a master at reading and predicting emotions in others. This often leads to:

1. Lack of self-esteem
   1. i.      Feeling other people’s emotions are more important than their own
   2. ii.      Experiencing a need to give and take care of with nothing in return
   3. iii.      A drain in energy and possible health problems later in life
2. Resentment and Anger
   1. i.      Feeling resentment toward anyone they give to
   2. ii.      Bottling anger inside and acting out in unhealthy ways
   3. iii.      Possible mental or emotional disorder and/or depression
   4. iv.      Underlying unhappiness and pattern of failed relationships

3)      Growing up having to care for or help care for someone who is chronically sick develops the empathic and compassionate sense so strongly that they will know someone is sick or has an ailment simply by intuition. This often leads to:

1. Lack of individuality
   1. i.      Focused only on helping others and not developing own wants and needs
   2. ii.      Relationships consisting of partner needing to be helped
   3. iii.      Chronic depression or denial or any personal problems, possibly developing health problems themselves.

Though the gift may seem like a curse as you become aware of it, remember there is a reason you came to be this way. Empaths are here to help others and bring insight through intuitive counseling, healing and teaching. But first you must understand the nature of it and use the tools provided to take control of your life. You deserve it!

To learn more about overcoming the challenges of empathic behavior and using the gifts to enrich your life, please try the guided meditations and exercises in this category on my website. Be empowered, you are Beautiful!